Ushering In A New Era

By Dwayne Morgan
Pride Columnist

If you’ve been following my columns, you’d know that earlier this year, I brought 14 Torontonians with me to South Africa, for a two week exploration of the history and culture of the country.

Like my visit to Cuba some years ago, I wanted to touch the soil while Nelson Mandela was still alive. While we hear and learn about Nelson Mandela here, being in South Africa, and speaking with the people, puts his life and sacrifices in a completely different perspective. I left South Africa with a respect for him that matches no other person that I can think of.

Today, we are facing a new era, a post Mandela South Africa, and there are many who wonder what will happen to the country once he passes. That discussion, however, is premature.

Over the last several weeks, there have been many reports as to Mandela’s condition. He has been in hospital for a month now, and there has been speculation that he is no longer breathing on his own, and that his brain function is now minimal. I cannot speculate on any of this as I am not there, however, I sat in a room last October and I watched my grandfather take his last breaths.

There comes a time when everything that can be done, has been done, and as people we have to let go. I believe that if machines aren’t enhancing your life, the important question then becomes, who are we prolonging this life for; the person lying there, or us with our desire to not see them go.

In the case of Nelson Mandela, he has given his life to the people. Maybe it is now, that he is close to his final rest, that his family is taking the time to be with him in a way that they never got to do before. Nelson Mandela was a man of purpose who sacrificed until he couldn’t any more.

This may be an important discussion for all of us to have with our loved ones. I have told my family on many occasions, that if I were to somehow wind up in a vegetative state, it would be my desire to have them pull the plug as soon as the doctors have confirmed that I won’t be coming back. I have no desire to be pitied or lie there like an exhibit at a museum; when it is my time, it is my time, and I want nothing more than to go.

People often say that death and weddings bring out the true colours in people for differing reasons. No-one likes the idea of death, and the grieving process is not one that anyone would ever wish for, but I believe that we have to remember the humanity of the person who has lived their life, and allow them to go with dignity. I don’t believe that we were meant to have machines keep us alive longer than what was written for us in the book of life.

The world will keep spinning, tomorrow will be a new day, and no matter who we are, we will all pass, and usher in a new era in the lives of our families and loved ones.

Want to comment on this column? Connect with me at www.dwaynemorgan.ca/writerscorner.